The Big Bang Theory Season 8 premiere recap

S8E1 - "The Locomotion Interruption"

Sheldon has his possessions stolen and is arrested for being a public nuisance. He calls Leonard to pick him up and Leonard decides to bring Amy along, who is annoyed he didn't call her instead. Bernadette gets Penny has an interview for a job selling pharmaceuticals. Howard and Raj visit Mrs. Wolowitz and learn that she is now dating Stuart; this news horrifies Howard. Raj tells Howard that perhaps he's overreacting to the news but he's later creeped out too when they try calling Mrs. Wolowitz for Howard to apologise and then they find that the outgoing voicemail is of both Mrs. Wolowitz and Stuart.

Leonard and Amy pick up Sheldon, who tells them on the ride home that he never even left the train station in any of the cities he stopped in, only caring about the trains themselves. Amy tells Sheldon off for insensitively leaving without saying goodbye and then calling Leonard for help instead of her. He then asks Penny to plug her ears so he can have a private word with Leonard. She obliges and then Sheldon reveals that he wants to "have coitus" with Amy and didn't want to call her and put his failures on display. Leonard advises him to just tell Amy the truth so Sheldon tells Amy he didn't want her to think less of him. She tells him it's okay to her that he's not perfect. He then asks for another private moment and tells Leonard that Amy has hurt his feelings and now he wants to break up with her.

Penny doesn't do well at her job interview initially. As she's leaving, she asks the interviewer to not tell Bernadette how badly she did because she finds Bernadette terrifying. The interviewer says he feels the same way and the two bond over their shared fear of Bernadette. This leads to Penny getting hired. Stuart goes over to Howard's to apologise but they then end up getting into another argument. Stuart tells Howard if he wants to apologise, he can find him at Mrs. Wolowitz's house, where he will be living.

Leonard and Amy tell Sheldon that he didn't fail entirely and that no one would have believed he was going to leave and go cross-country before he left. Sheldon sees the truth in their words and of course takes it overboard, declaring he can now take on any changes in life. But upon going inside the apartment and seeing Penny's shorter haircut, he says that he can't take it and leaves. He returns later and shows Leonard and Penny photos from his trip.

S8E2 - "The Junior Professor Solution"

Tension arises between Bernadette and Penny when Bernadette advises her to study up using the notes she has given Penny but Penny says she'll learn what she needs to know during training. Penny goes to Amy to complain about Bernadette's behaviour, presenting Amy with the opportunity to gossip and trash-talk, something she didn't get to do as a schoolgirl. She later gossips with Bernadette about Penny, revelling in every bit of it. She is now the popular girl. Penny later decides to buckle down and study and Bernadette realises she was being a bit too hard on her, thus ending Amy's time as a mean girl.

Sheldon is offered the opportunity to be promoted to a junior professor, which would give him more money and the job of teaching a class whatever he likes. But Sheldon is unhappy, not wanting to teach a class, though this is the only way he'll be able to move away from working on String Theory. Just when Sheldon begins to warm to the idea, he finds that no one has signed up for his class because of his reputation for being obnoxious. Howard offers to take Sheldon's class, as he is considering getting his doctorate. Sheldon disrespects Howard, per usual, claiming he isn't smart enough to take the class. Howard ends up quitting the class when Sheldon refuses to teach properly, only aiming to make things difficult and humiliate him. The boys later quiz each other on various trivia and revel in how smart they are, rewarding each other with sweets.

The Big Bang Theory airs on Mondays on CBS at 8PM, but will return to its regular Thursday slot time on October 30.